form 4 - the end

6th february 2017, i stepped into mrsm bentong. not just it, i stepped into a world full of difference. another world that somehow changed me. i met a lot of people, true and fake. i cried a lot this year. i couldnt tell anyone anything specifically about the things that bothered me but thankfully there's people who got my back even they dont know what was going on.

 

cried bcs of mpp, teachers, friends, results, a guy. nothing made me feel better than crying. 

alhamdulillah, i came to realisation that it was the efforts that were important. without efforts you go nowhere. even if i have did a lot but resulted to nothing, its ok. he has arranged everything for me very perfectly. and i learnt that its ok to cry. its very fine.

to him - thank you for being someone special this year to me, even if you werent or arent going to be mine. you noticed my feelings, but maybe there's someone else. or maybe you just hated me. you avoided me. i thought we could be friends. but its okay. you made me happy. you sang me the birthday song. you were nice to me. you were full of charisma. everytime. you looked hot as VP 1. you looked cute when you smiled. you made me go crazy. you were my type. don't forget to smile a lot. because you look good. be a soldier like you wanted. be an engineer. be a millionaire. you're fired up.

its not fair that i noticed everything perfect on you, without any flaws. its not fair. 

you made me cry a few times.

but maybe you're looking for somebody else.

to fatiha, thank you for accompanying me since day 1. without you i wont survive alone. a best friend since smkpu1, sorry if i bothered or annoyed you at times but you're the best.

to aina mardhiah, thank you for being my listener and a good advisor. you taught me a lot, motivated me a lot. thank you so much. 

to afiqah, we fought quite some times. i understood you were alone. thank you for being sweet and romantic to me. you're a true friend. i love you.

danisha, athirah, sarah, mai, janis, dania, ifaa,

sorry for not being perfect. i love you guys so much. i love you guys a lot. even if you hate me, i forgive you guys, and thank you for everything in 2017. 

and others, thank you for teaching me a lot this year. thank you for everything. i appreciate every each of your presence in my life. im sorry if i have hurted anybody in some ways, and i forgive everyone.

ya Allah, may you grant these people your rahmat.

my inner-poet

the universe
how gargantuan it is,
enormously unfurled around the earth.

looked up to the blinking lights at night
i asked - then where would he be?
veiling himself behind
indeed waiting for us to find. yes, he is
near. he sees me, he listens to my heart, he knows.
gazed the stars, deep into the void and

praised him.
how vast the outside exactly is?
of  the big bang, of
the cosmos?
oh Allah, please guide me
get me closer to you by
roaming the universe
and i never wanted to fall into the fire
paradise lasts forever, it's my only
hope, to always get back up.

------aina zulaikha, 12/1/2017, 1413
 p/s: acrostic poem, the living photograph. my english homework xD

kdramas aka source of happiness.....and sadness

before pt3 i actually stopped watching kdramas for a month or more as i thought that it will affect my time; study, entertainment and other things. so i decided to stop. and now that pt3 has ended i found that im so bored LIKE HELL. nak keluar rumah tak boleh. bila dalam rumah macam orang tak ada life. so i ended up continuing my kdrama addiction!!!! WOOHOOO KDRAMA BRINGS ME BACK MY LIFE. istg im not lying. it actually gives you life. you will not feel bored and it makes you addicted. i dont know if this is wrong but I LOVE KDRAMAS. huhu bukan macam drama 'yang berdasarkan novel' kat astro asyik asyik gaduh pastu kena kawin pastu suka sama suka. tak pun kena tangkap basah dulu hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

soooo here i am listing my fav kdramas ever with my short summary which i thought it was a good watch and the very bomb storyline and kudos to the writers and directors and casts I LOVE U thank u for existing!!! also not forgetting the ost songs for every kdrama ya Allah idk but these people are so creative. you know, koreans are actually just creative. thats why they got good entertainment with talented people. (will update if there's more!)

1. Descendants of the Sun - well this one was a hit this year! apparently i started watching it because i love to see soldiers haha xd i cried a lot too because of this drama tbh, sorry it was too sad. idk but when koreans do it, semuanya menjadi. hahaha and also they put bits and pieces of comedy too where you'd laugh your ass off. haha definitely recommended! 9/10!

2. Scarlet Heart: Ryeo (Moon Lovers) - ok so this one im quite enthusiastic about. my recent and most favourite one! i didnt really like to watch historical dramas but this one gOT ME SHOOK GUYS. idk but everything about this drama is perfect. what makes me attracted is actually the storyline because its quite complicated. family members betray each other trying to get to the throne- to be the king, to rule goryeo. oh yeah speaking of goryeo, believe it or not it is based on the real korean history! but i guess they added some little changes. but its still based on the true one, dont worry. they kill and even torture people. but please beware, there are too much deaths in this drama. you'll love it though. oh and love triangle too,... or love circle i could say? fun but sad fact: the main character is the most broke main character you'll ever see! and i also do like the ending because its not happy and not sad either. its in between. to rate- 10/10!!

p/s: these dramas made me go through withdrawals for days where i actually got sad after they have ended and i didnt know what to do with my life anymore after that.

with kdramas i learnt so much knowledge about military, diseases, doctors, surgeons including korean history. wait why not malaysian history? hahahahahah mana la nak belajar malaysian history kalau asyik gaduh suka gaduh suka je hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm kbye

movie-thon

since we moved again to puchong, i frequently watch movies with my dad and my sister at the cinema. my dad is rarely at home because he's working in labuan, of course. so every time he comes home we'll find time to spend together by watching movies haha well we still pretty good though. if not at the cinema, me and my sister will hit on our laptops on weekends and search for any movies to watch. but starting the mid of the year she had to enrol into her university and we stopped. well she also goes out a lot to the cinema with her friends (im not sure how lot). but everytime she comes home she'll always watch at least one movie on her laptop. sometimes we'll watch it together but sometimes not. most of them, of course, horror movies. im pretty equal to any type of movies. i can go with any genre. hmm, i dont think that this is actually a good thing to do always but somehow its quite benefitting though. i thought about it for some time and watching movies does not give that bad of an effect actually- not specifically movies, maybe k-dramas or other shows on tv. (yep its me here prefering the positive than the negative of things)

you know, when we watch something, we use our brains too, everybody knows that. we process the storyline in our brain, what they're talking and what do they mean. im not lying that k-dramas and korean reality shows actually make you more intelligent. im not lying. (im pretty much a k-drama addict huhu) we dont understand korean, do we? haha, so we watch them with subtitles. the subtitles make us read. they are translated by some kind-hearted people on earth and we actually get to know SO MUCH new words, SO MUCH knowledge about doctors, surgeons, illnesses, military, history, rich people, how to run companies and a lot more hahaha xd and when they keep repeating the same words over and over again which we dont even know what the meanings are, we are able to understand them quickly as related to the storyline. thats why i prefer watching movies with subtitles. i believe the writers want to make their viewers think, and learn. watching movies doesnt make you any stupid. they are done with updates and trends of the 21st century and we gain a lot of general knowledge and there's nothing wrong to that.

"do you watch malay movies?"
depends. im not saying im not supporting malay movies but frankly speaking not all of them match my genre. some of them do. the latest malay movie that i think is great is Polis Evo. not because of trends, soz not soz. i actually liked the genre. and all the police stuff in the movie was great. i watched a lot of malay horror movies back in the days, and i liked this one malay horror movie in 2008, called 'Histeria'. its about a geng in an all girls school that was haunted by some spirit from their school. there were also the series of 'Pontianak Harum Sundal Malam' woowww legend guys. and not forgetting 'Jangan Pandang Belakang'. cute ghosts.

i want to share a few favourite movies of mine, these are must-watchs and of course they are in this list for some reason of course. really really like how they are made, and i had withdrawals for weeks after watching them. perfect storyline, gorgeous ghosts, how some characters die, the plot twists, the science they applied, or history they included in. kudos to the writers.

(i dont remember some so i'll constantly update this list)
p/s: if anybody ever wonders where did i watch all of these, i watch them at this one software called 'Popcorn Time', search for it on google, you can actually download it for free :-) they're 100% up-to-date, always on time.

1. Pearl Harbor (2001) - true-based, the japanese attacking the pearl harbor during world war ii. very sad TT
2. Histeria (2008) - the best malay horror movie i've ever seen.
3. The Ring (2002) - the cursed video clip freaked the shit out of me. but its still aesthetic as hell
4. Interstellar (2014) - hands down the best sci-fi i've ever seen. VERY RECOMMENDED.
5. The Age of Adaline (2015) - blake lively looks SO MUCH like neelofa.
6. 10 Cloverfield Lane (2016) - major plot twists alert. you'll be 'wtf'-ing the whole time.
7. Divergent (2014) - i was super into it. but then the sequel wasnt reaching expectations huhu
8. Miracle in Cell no. 7 (2013) - a korean movie, about a daughter and a dad. this one is damn sad guys.
9. Nerve (2016) - ok this one is about an online game which actually results to a cyber crime. love them together!
10. Now You See Me series (2013 & 2016) - my fav!! i love the horsemen's magic tricks like damn
11. Happy Death Day (2017) - this movie is so fucked up it can stress you out
12.

goals

1. ramble the world. yes, every other people's first bucket list. i know this is quite mainstream but who doesnt want to go to visit other countries? i really want to visit so much places, study their culture, collect their 1 ringgit worth money, eat their foods, and speak their language.
2. before i manage to go travel overseas i'd like to discover malaysia first. tanah tumpah darahku. my homeland, my birth place. i'd love to go deep into its history and culture. i love malaysia <333
3. go to a CL concert overseas and wear fab clothes and take badass photos with her. MY QUEEN. YES. GONNA MEET HER. ON ONE FINE DAY.
4. master in skiing and snowboarding. and have my own ski and snowboard apparel and essentials :)
5. umrah to saudi arabia. insha allah! makkah especially <333 i've been dying to observe everything there. the architecture, the people, the food, the culture!!
6. own a dazzling bright red audi. or bmw. or mercedes. i've been so obsessed to own a car myself huhu cant wait
7. get a lasik surgery. because im tired of spectacles. and i dont want contacts.
8. master at least 5 foreign languages. yes i love speaking. in foreign languages. im currently learning arabic in school and a part time hangul learner. yep i know im so kpop.
9. lose and get my ideal weight JUST BY SWIMMING. this need to be proven scientifically by aina zulaikha
10. to have a legit makeup collection :-)
11. own a studio or a small apartment in another country and stay there just by myself. i'll decorate my home very beautifully and live in it omg
12. i want to continue my studies overseas so bad. insha allah canada or turkey or morocco or sweden <333
13. be a charismatic engineer!!! huhu lets be optimistic
14.